Eat, Read, and Be Mommy

One of my best friends and I had our two youngest children within three weeks of each other.  I’m thinking it was sometime in the following year that she lent me Tina Cassidy’s Birth:  The Surprising History of How We Are Born, but the truth is, my memories are hazy and she remembers nothing about this at all.  (Which is partly what makes me think it was within a year after having our babies…)  I’m pretty sure she’d found it interesting, however, and was thinking I might as well; now that I’ve gotten around to it (those babies we had are FOUR YEARS OLD, and I’m not sure how that happened), I did indeed find it interesting.  The book focuses more on the western world, certainly, but Cassidy provides enough statistics, anecdotes, and history to fascinate anyone.  I was often riled in the reading–let’s face it, women endured a great deal of pain (which not infrequently ended in death) as a result of supreme stupidity, inexcusable arrogance, and completely misguided ideas–but I was also amazed, fascinated, and even amused by turns.

I will say, however, that I enjoyed the history most; her interpretation of the modern era feels (perhaps unconsciously) skewed towards the “birth is an EXPERIENCE” end of the spectrum.  I didn’t necessarily feel that she referenced my sort of birth experience–she talks about some women having c-sections because they “don’t want to put their vaginas at risk,” but her tone seems almost flippant.  (For those of us who ripped as far as you can rip, who had more stitches after a vaginal birth than after a subsequent c-section, and who wondered at their baby’s 9 month checkup if sex would ever stop hurting again, it isn’t JUST vaginas at risk, and this is not an issue to be flippant about.)  She talks about lactation consultants from La Leche League as women who teach, help, and support breastfeeding mothers;  this is, of course, true in theory, and undoubtedly true of some (perhaps many?), but I know mothers from multiple areas of the country who felt bullied by those consultants (some refer to them as “Nursing Nazis”).  I still wish I’d complained to the hospital administration about one of mine–she gave me completely false information and then informed me, when I told her that what she was doing hurt, that “it shouldn’t!”.  (And NOT in an “oh, let me fix that, then” kind of way.  She also noticeably disapproved of–and subtly disparaged–my very first successful attempts at breastfeeding, which pushed me that much further down the path of postpartum depression.)  Cassidy’s self-evaluation at the conclusion, however, was reassuringly human; ultimately I was far more fascinated than frustrated.  If you’re looking for an interesting (if by no means complete) history of childbirth, look no further.  (And, really, an actual, fully complete history of childbirth all over the world?  Ain’t NOBODY got time for that!)